In case you didn't know, Haley Mills doesn't have a twin sister. That was studio magic that made her twin appear to appear on screen at the same time in the 1961 Disney movie, “The Parent Trap.” Perhaps we need a little studio magic or Haley Mills high jinx to solve the riddle of the new parent trap — the industry moniker for Rule 54-305, which limits the amount of Universal Service Fund support a service provider can receive for newly acquired exchanges to whatever the original parent company was receiving.

This may seem a little too “Pollyanna” (coincidentally also a Haley Mills movie) to think the issue can get resolved in the current re-evaluation of USF, but the launch this week of Windstream, Alltel's wireline spinoff, gives us reason to keep the trap conversation going.

Windstream has certain limits on what it can acquire in the first couple of years as its own publicly traded company, somewhere in the vicinity of 71 million shares. So the company will focus on acquisitions — when it's ready — of smaller scale. But when those limits are lifted, Windstream could be a prime candidate for those millions of rural access lines that Verizon and SBC are looking to dump — except that the parent trap has ruled out potential acquirers to this point.

If Windstream can't invest in new lines the same way it can invest in its existing lines, what would the point be in acquiring them? Windstream must turn those underserved voice customers into fully served broadband and entertainment customers. If the goal of the regulators is to expand broadband services to the whole country, it may have to perform a little magic and actually dispense with something that is as dated as a Haley Mills film.

As is, it only makes sense to acquire companies with the same USF support, leaving the underserved rural lines of the big carriers in legal limbo. It's amazing that the 1961 film is still being reviewed online. Let's hope the new parent trap isn't under review as long.